Warning: the following video is not for the faint of heart.

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While the politicians in Washington debate over what constitutes torture, we have a similar discussion here in our home.  If a bath incites hysterics in an infant, is it worth it? 

 I, for one, am standing on the firm side of NO. 

We purchased the new baby bathtub for multiple reasons – 1. we had tossed the old one 2. we needed something compact 3. it was affordable and 4. it came highly recommended.  Seriously, the reviews promised bathing bliss which seemed great considering my feelings about bath time.  The product claims that it provides “a safe and secure environment, similar to that of a mother’s womb.”

Evidently, my womb is far superior given Ellie’s reaction to the Pod (not to mention how long she stayed within the confines of my body).  Should I feel pride at the posh-ness of my inner most parts?  It might be a little weird . . .

Anyway, her aversion and reaction to water makes even the prospect of giving her a bath an unpleasant experience.  Because of this, she hasn’t had many baths.

It was making me feel like a negligent mother, letting her lie in her own filth and all.  I was okay with it as long as it was our dirty little secret.  But then, last week I was scheduled to help out with prepping the seminarians get ready to teach VBS.  It was an early morning appointment and I had to scoop Ellie up and go, just as she was.  When she woke during my session, Susan went to get her and I thought it best to warn her of Ellie’s current state.

“She’s in the same outfit she wore yesterday [and thereby, the same one she slept in].  ‘Cause that’s how I roll.”  I was embarrassed to admit my failings as a mother to Susan and in front of all the sems.  I think this says something about my feelings towards confession . . . I digress.

I was well on my way to wallowing in interior shame when one of the guys muttered to himself, “It’s just a baby!” 

It brought me back to reality.

Yes, sometimes she pukes on herself, but I’m on top of that.  Same with the diapers.  But for heaven’s sake, she IS just a baby; it’s not like she’s out rolling in the dirt or sweating to the oldies on a daily basis.  How dirty can she get?

In the end, what I’ve learned is this: Ellie believes soap and water is the greatest threat to her existence next to having her diaper changed.  The Wash Pod doesn’t live up to it’s hype – YET.  No matter where I stand on the issue of water boarding I DO believe bath time with my baby is torture (for her and for me).  As a result, baths daily or even every other day are not necessary.

After all, she is just a baby.